Beyond the Weather

Sanity-saving conversation tips for the anxious and introverted

Photo by Alex Holyoake on Unsplash

You might not guess it by the brash and bossy way I write sometimes, but I can be a shy, introverted, bucket of awkward around those I don’t know well. In the protective sphere of family and friends, I’m a fun-loving spitfire, but I’m also the person who responds to a stranger’s friendly “How are you today?” with “You too!”

Whether it’s personality, choice of topic, or energy level, conversation, especially small talk, can be an energy vampire to the anxious and introverted. Here are some tips to help you engage and even enjoy conversation with others.

Have an exit strategy

Our next door neighbors (let’s call them Lyle and Talulah) are retired. Talulah enjoys puttering around the garden, reading on the patio, and generally keeps to herself. Lyle, by contrast, will take the sound of our garage door opening as a challenge to see how fast he can bound over to our driveway in his orthotic high tops for high fives and an epic conversation about the squirrel population of the neighborhood.

I like Lyle. I like Talulah. Guess who I’d rather run into? When I do run into Lyle, we exchange pleasantries, and then I deliver a polite excuse and make like a heat-seeking missile for my door. I give myself…